This election will make or break Steve Bannon!
This election determines the outcome of Trump’s tenure!
This election means the GOP is lost!
This election predicts a wave for the Democrats!
Step right up, ladies and gentleman, the price is zero to watch this nation burn to the ground.
What a circus! Everything to tantalize the senses from hearing the pompous moralites, to witnessing a Goldman Sachs carnival barker, to smelling the odor coming from the trunk-to-tail-linked highest echelons of the Republican Party. Listen to that calliope play!
And sex? We got it. Anything you want, allegations abound, and we can spend months talking about it, putting everyone’s focus on it, tweeting hot takes about it — all to make the race a sideshow about who is more moral and ethical. Because that’s how you put on the stupidest show on earth.
Don’t leave without getting your poster of Bozo the Clown, otherwise known as Addison Mitchell McConnell Jr. and his band of goofy, naive, foolish, ignorant, yet still employed pranksters who can always be counted on to repeatedly throw a pie in the face of the American electorate and point the finger at innocent grassroots conservatives.
Yet McConnell and his clowns will continue to tell us how hard Mitch is working to keep his majority. He’s saving the American people from themselves, don’t ya know!
The show is stupid, the show is predictable … and it isn’t funny.
Some are out there asking, “When do you think Mitch and his ilk will realize it’s over for them?” My money says never. We will be ushering in a Democrat-run Senate next year, and that will be his own doing. And it won’t bother him, because he keeps his influence either way.
King Mitch knows the grassroots want him out of leadership, so he’ll keep throwing NRSC money at losers, because dammit — if Republicans win the majority with conservative candidates, he loses his position. And position is all that matters.
So we have the Senate majority leader trying to manipulate the outcome of every single Senate race, which will actually cause him to become the minority leader (a position he is much more comfortable with). Mitch wins either way, and either way we lose.
Mitch McConnell is a bumbling buffoon who is propped up by the slimiest political hangers-on imaginable — those who do not care about the outcome for the nation and who do not trust the electorate.
Right now, Mitch is talked about in hushed tones on Capitol Hill, that perhaps he picked the wrong person to back in the Alabama primary. D.C. Republicans are so far behind the American people, it’s a joke. We could have told you that, but it wouldn’t matter because King Mitch needs his bought-and-paid-for loyalists.
Republican Senate candidates ought to take note: If there were ever a list of people who were afraid to put their country first, Mitch McConnell would be on that list.
But if there were a list of people who were afraid of success, McConnell would top it, because Mitch thinks of Mitch first, second and third in a jacked-up prism of bipartisan propriety that only exists in his head, and for the rest of the fake people in D.C.
If you value your country, and believe in its promise, you must reject the leadership of Addison Mitchell McConnell Jr. He is more comfortable with being a minority leader because as majority leader, every time he ruins key legislation his leadership takes a hit.
To his way of thinking, if he’s the minority leader, he’ll be better positioned with a group of progressive Republicans who will go along with whatever the Democrats come up with, and blame everything on Steve Bannon. And the stupid show continues.
Meanwhile, as the cameras and newspapers record the events of D.C. and Hollywood and New York, the regular American looks to the heavens and asks if this is really how it all ends. Distraction, stupidity, and a never-ending circus where a republic used to be.
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Jen Kuznicki is a contributor to Conservative Review, a blue-collar wife and mom, a political writer, humorist, and conservative activist, a seamstress by trade, and compelled to write. Follow her on Twitter @JenKuznicki.