Moore cowbell: Top 5 tweets of the week

As the Roy Moore scandal descended from the righteous outrage to the ridiculous — with credible-sounding accusers tainted by fake news like the debunked "Moore was banned from the mall" story and Gloria Allred's unwillingness to definitively declare that her most compelling evidence against Moore wasn't a fraud — it's time for the biting commentary such a cynically hacktastic political environment deserves.

And I'm just the hopeless fellow to bring it.

Therefore, without further ado, I now announce my top 5 tweets of the week, from those whose sardonic wit and/or plainspoken insight cut through one of the biggest steaming piles of horse-pucky Kabuki theater I've seen in my political career. Oh, and a couple from me, too.

#5

If you’re a GOP donor, you should be royal ticked @SenateMajLdr wasted $30 million of your money to destroy @MooreSenate, when all he had to do was talk to the counter guy at Sbarro at the local mall food court.

— Steve Deace (@SteveDeaceShow) November 15, 2017

Think of how many rendezvous with the mistresses of K-Street fat cats could've been paid for with all that money instead? And all old Ditch had to do this whole time was send one of his media stenographers ... err ... reporters over to the food court in Gadsden?

#4

Gadsden mall scene sounds like it was lit af

— Allahpundit (@allahpundit) November 16, 2017

Who knew that an Alabama mall in the heart of the Bible Belt was really "Fast Times at Ridgemont High"?

#3

Jeb Bush says we should stand for decency. I agree! He should start by talking to his daddy. Call Todd to weigh in on the Todd Starnes Show 888 788 9910

— toddstarnes (@toddstarnes) November 14, 2017

This is one of a series of blistering tweets from Fox News' Todd Starnes, who was pointing out the shameless hypocrisy of the GOP establishment regarding this story. In fact, Jeb Bush made those comments on the very day his father was accused of groping by a sixth woman. Furthermore, a seventh woman came forward last night and accused the former president of groping her during the 1992 campaign.

No further virtue-signaling has been seen from Jeb.

#2

I heard Roy Moore was born in Canada.

— Caleb Howe (@CalebHowe) November 15, 2017

Howe is one of my favorites on the Right, whether we agree or disagree, because he's honest and wickedly funny. This tweet, in which he expressed his overall frustration with the Moore story and the loyalty of his base despite the charges, made me laugh out loud. In the bathroom. By myself. That's how funny this reference to the asinine birtherism that dogged Ted Cruz during the 2016 GOP primary was.

#1

Waiting for @MittRomney to demand Al Franken resign over these serious allegations. pic.twitter.com/fnqxKF7ECt

— Steve Deace (@SteveDeaceShow) November 16, 2017

And finally, if you can't toot your own horn, what good is having a byline, right?

By the way, I'm still waiting for Romney — and almost every other elected Republican in America for that matter — to hold Al Franken to the same standard in the face of photographic evidence in his case. And waiting ... and waiting ... and waiting ... and waiting ...

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